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Search Me...


Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139: 23-24)
          The other day, I got to write about Joshua 1:9, one of my favorite verses. Today, I get to write about a passage that is in one of my favorite psalms. For a long time, I didn’t like this passage. I mean, read it! Search me? God? Search me? Um, no thank you. If God knew my heart, He’d know how corrupt it is. If He knew my anxious thoughts, He’d be embarrassed that He ever even considered having anything to do with me. Lightning bolt? Sulfur and hellfire? Yes, those would be more likely. And when He found the offensive ways in me – too many to count – well, what could He do but shake His head and turn away? Can we just stop reading with verse 22? 
          As I said, I didn’t like this passage. Past tense. I can’t tell you when or how it changed. I just realized one day that it was suddenly very important that God search, test, know, see, and lead because I don’t want the offensive way to be there. At least when I think about it, the presence of the offensive way has become more painful than the idea of God’s dealing with it.

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