Both the one who makes people holy and those who are
made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers
and sisters. He says,
“I
will declare your name to my brothers and sisters;
in the assembly I will sing your praises.”
in the assembly I will sing your praises.”
And again,
“I
will put my trust in him.”
And again he says,
“Here
am I, and the children God has given me.” (Hebrews 2:11-13)
Recently,
I shared a conversation I’ve had with God, a number of times:
Me: “I don’t understand.”
God: “That’s OK, you don’t need to.”
Me: “No, You don’t understand, I don’t understand.”
Today’s conversation is similar:
Me: “I’m flawed.”
God (or anyone else) “So is everyone around you.”
Me: “No, you don’t understand. I’m flawed.”
It doesn’t matter how flawed everyone else is. I’m not interested in being one of the herd because that means I don’t matter. I try to tell myself I’m not Edmund Pevensie (Chronicles of Narnia) but I am. I long to be special. I am desperate to not be a failure – a failure at everything by-the-way. And yes, I’m exaggerating a little bit (a very little bit) and no, it’s not “OK.”
“OK” just makes it worse.
For years, I refused to wear a cross or put a fish or cross (or some such) on my car. If I did those things and (for example) exceeded the speed limit by .01 mph, others would say, “Yep, there’s another of those hypocritical Christians who say they follow Jesus. Shameful.” But, of course, my solution wasn’t to put one on my car and make sure to obey the law. (And it’s not that I want to disobey the law, I just don’t want to pay attention to what I’m doing. I just want to get whatever done!)
People post those stupid (anti-Christian) bits of garbage on Face Book saying, “If you’re not ashamed of God…” share, or like, or whatever. Clearly, I hate those posts with a passion, but you know what – the issue isn’t whether or not I’m ashamed of God – it’s whether I think He should be ashamed of me.
And the folks who insist that others love (as an expression of emotion) or otherwise feel; those folks who consider themselves champions of the warm-and-fuzzy who find fault with the use of the mind instead of the heart – I introvert my feelings. They (especially anger) may leak out – but only because I’m full to overflowing and they have nowhere else to go. By the time they do overflow – Look out! But in the meanwhile, the judgement by those hate-filled folks that I’m flawed because I am not their warm-and-fuzzy reflection just adds to the number of ways I’m flawed.
Those cruel people who say, “You shouldn’t feel that way” are right, but all that means is that the big flashing light over my head that says “FAILURE” is correct. And when cruel people say of homosexuals “they can’t help it, they’re born that way,” but find fault with me when I have no more control of how I feel than they do – that just adds to the misery. I’m supposed to control how I feel, what I believe, and what I do – I should be ashamed of myself, but they’re just fine, in fact, we should be legally required to celebrate their feelings, but I should be sent far away where I can do no more harm.
Once, when I explained the biochemical basis for my introversion, someone said, “Oh, so they could give you medication to make you better?” (And no, I’m not making this up in order to attack someone else, I’m just drawing a parallel.)
What does all of the above have to do with today’s Scripture? The author of Hebrews says that
Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters. He says, “I will declare your name to my brothers and sisters; in the assembly I will sing your praises.”
My sin is that I live according to what I feel instead of what Scripture says is true. God has called me on this more than once. He asked if I thought Him so small a god that He could not handle whatever level of embarrassment I might cause Him. He also told me that “that’s what grace is about.”
But He never said that it’s OK for me to feel and believe the way I do. Those things are sin. Claiming “it’s not my fault” may be at least partly accurate, but that doesn’t remove the sin because we’re accepting what the world is telling us, or what we are telling ourselves as having more authority than what Scripture proclaims.
I understand how people feel when their sin seems so much a part of them that it becomes their identity. I know what it’s like to live out lies. But God says we’re not to live out of what our petty gods (our feelings, our bodies, our thoughts) tell us. That’s the “bread alone” that we’re not to live on. We are to live on “every word that comes from the mouth of God.” (Matthew 4:4 quoting Deuteronomy 8:3.) And we all know what the better food is. It’s our sin that we are so attached to the “bread” that the Word doesn’t count.
Me: “I don’t understand.”
God: “That’s OK, you don’t need to.”
Me: “No, You don’t understand, I don’t understand.”
Today’s conversation is similar:
Me: “I’m flawed.”
God (or anyone else) “So is everyone around you.”
Me: “No, you don’t understand. I’m flawed.”
It doesn’t matter how flawed everyone else is. I’m not interested in being one of the herd because that means I don’t matter. I try to tell myself I’m not Edmund Pevensie (Chronicles of Narnia) but I am. I long to be special. I am desperate to not be a failure – a failure at everything by-the-way. And yes, I’m exaggerating a little bit (a very little bit) and no, it’s not “OK.”
“OK” just makes it worse.
For years, I refused to wear a cross or put a fish or cross (or some such) on my car. If I did those things and (for example) exceeded the speed limit by .01 mph, others would say, “Yep, there’s another of those hypocritical Christians who say they follow Jesus. Shameful.” But, of course, my solution wasn’t to put one on my car and make sure to obey the law. (And it’s not that I want to disobey the law, I just don’t want to pay attention to what I’m doing. I just want to get whatever done!)
People post those stupid (anti-Christian) bits of garbage on Face Book saying, “If you’re not ashamed of God…” share, or like, or whatever. Clearly, I hate those posts with a passion, but you know what – the issue isn’t whether or not I’m ashamed of God – it’s whether I think He should be ashamed of me.
And the folks who insist that others love (as an expression of emotion) or otherwise feel; those folks who consider themselves champions of the warm-and-fuzzy who find fault with the use of the mind instead of the heart – I introvert my feelings. They (especially anger) may leak out – but only because I’m full to overflowing and they have nowhere else to go. By the time they do overflow – Look out! But in the meanwhile, the judgement by those hate-filled folks that I’m flawed because I am not their warm-and-fuzzy reflection just adds to the number of ways I’m flawed.
Those cruel people who say, “You shouldn’t feel that way” are right, but all that means is that the big flashing light over my head that says “FAILURE” is correct. And when cruel people say of homosexuals “they can’t help it, they’re born that way,” but find fault with me when I have no more control of how I feel than they do – that just adds to the misery. I’m supposed to control how I feel, what I believe, and what I do – I should be ashamed of myself, but they’re just fine, in fact, we should be legally required to celebrate their feelings, but I should be sent far away where I can do no more harm.
Once, when I explained the biochemical basis for my introversion, someone said, “Oh, so they could give you medication to make you better?” (And no, I’m not making this up in order to attack someone else, I’m just drawing a parallel.)
What does all of the above have to do with today’s Scripture? The author of Hebrews says that
Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters. He says, “I will declare your name to my brothers and sisters; in the assembly I will sing your praises.”
My sin is that I live according to what I feel instead of what Scripture says is true. God has called me on this more than once. He asked if I thought Him so small a god that He could not handle whatever level of embarrassment I might cause Him. He also told me that “that’s what grace is about.”
But He never said that it’s OK for me to feel and believe the way I do. Those things are sin. Claiming “it’s not my fault” may be at least partly accurate, but that doesn’t remove the sin because we’re accepting what the world is telling us, or what we are telling ourselves as having more authority than what Scripture proclaims.
I understand how people feel when their sin seems so much a part of them that it becomes their identity. I know what it’s like to live out lies. But God says we’re not to live out of what our petty gods (our feelings, our bodies, our thoughts) tell us. That’s the “bread alone” that we’re not to live on. We are to live on “every word that comes from the mouth of God.” (Matthew 4:4 quoting Deuteronomy 8:3.) And we all know what the better food is. It’s our sin that we are so attached to the “bread” that the Word doesn’t count.
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