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Habits


                One of the things I've had on my mind is the question of how to build good habits when I got here. I may even have been being anxious about them. In my previous life, I never seemed to have time for things that I thought were important. Now that I'm here, I have to begin to build those habits. Some of them were on my mental list: taking care of Dad, spending time on spiritual matters, writing and creativity, education,  taking better care of myself physically, training Gracie, etc. Some have become more obvious now that I'm in the situation.

                Some of this has been sort of natural. Since we didn't have electricity for several days, we were going to bed around 9. That means that by 7 at the latest, Gracie was saying "Morning time!" Since it's against the rules to chain dogs outside, I've been putting the lead on her and walking. For the past three days, I have managed to walk more than 5 miles per day, mostly in the morning when it's cooler.

                Some of my habit building is by necessity. Those who camp know: a place for everything and everything in its place. I knew that, but it's so easy for "in a minute" to turn into never. Not only am I making progress on my things, but I'm thinking maybe by the time I return north, I'll have made a dent in the stuff that Dad's been used to leaving out.

                Some of my habit building is experimental. I borrowed a book from the library about blessing. While I don't agree with the liberal philosophy espoused, it has inspired me to begin to pray for the people who spend their winter in the park I walk through. By the time today is over, I hope to have asked for some blessing on every residence in the park. We'll see how that habit develops.

                The thing about habits is that you have to think about them a lot so that you can not have to think about them at all. You have to be very deliberate and careful about them in order to have then be natural. You have to put effort into them so that they become effortless. Years ago I walked and jogged at the Wintergreen Gorge Cemetery. Like many cemeteries, it is built on the side of a hill. I slowed to a walk at the bottom of the uphill side and whined, "I don' wannnnnna."

                And God said, "OK, you don't have to. But are you gonna?"

                This was not what God was supposed to say, of course. He was either supposed to say, "UP THAT HILL, SOLDIER!" or "YOU CAN DO IT, rah, Rah, RAH!" At the very least, He was supposed to be more grammatically correct! I have to choose? I got to choose? I gritted my teeth and went up that hill. And then whined when I reached the bottom again.

         That's what I'm trying to do - to choose to do even when I don' wannnnnna.

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