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Hard Work


       It's a tricky business, trying to thoughtfully make a new, healthy life. It means changes to diet and exercise routines, starting educational endeavors and projects that we always promise ourselves we'd do "someday." The thing that has stopped me in my tracks is stopping. One of the things I love about not working for someone else is that I have Sundays off. It's a time to set aside to spend with God and family. Then Sunday comes and I have to say, "ummmmm."

                Job #1 is caregiver to an 86 year old man, an adolescent dog and myself. I am on-duty 24/7. I'm not needed all that time, but Sunday as a family time makes Sunday like every other day. Maybe more so. How do stay-at-home moms get a Sabbath while still making it about family?

                Job #2 is as a writer. So, on Sundays do I not read anything? Do no research? Write nothing? Not think about whatever has become my temporary obsession, or anything that might become a temporary obsession if I start thinking about it? For the sake of mental health, that's a really good idea, but practically? On Sundays, I have to become someone I'm not? Excuse me while I laugh...and weep.

                Of course, the other part is that Sunday is a day focused on God. I consider at least part of my reading, writing and research to be a ministry. So how do ministers separate the time focused on God in their ministry from the time focused on God for the Sabbath?

                In some ways, holidays are easier. At least with a holiday there's a theme (and perhaps that's a clue for Sundays.) Holidays  also harder. When I worked in retail I learned to hate holidays. Sometimes I had to miss the holiday completely because I had to work. Sometimes, the holiday was shoved down our throats in the worst, most commercial way, with holiday spirits and holiday stress bringing out the worst in everyone involved, especially in me.

                I have tended to spend my holidays quietly, contemplation on the meaning of the day being preferable to all the fun, games, and socializing that are staples of holidays for others. I know that celebration is a positive, healthy thing.  The challenge is to find a way to make the quiet and contemplation of the holidays different from the quiet and contemplation of other days - and to make it a celebration for everyone involved.

                Stopping, resting,  or celebrating in a purposeful, thoughtful, healthy, re-creational manner is hard work.

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