Brothers and sisters, I do not regard myself as having taken hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, (Philippians 3:13)
Full disclosure – this is being written on Christmas
afternoon. I’m ready for Christmas to be over. It’s not that I want to put the
decorations away or stop listening to Christmas music. It’s the fact that “it’s
Christmas” and therefore, everything is supposed to spend the day in neutral. It’s
the fact that it’s time to turn our attention to shutting down 2020 and
preparing for 2021. In other words, I want Christmas to be over because then I
can pretend to exercise some control over my own life.
It’s sort of like following someone down the highway. You’re
both doing five miles per hour over the speed limit, but the fact that you are
behind the other driver means you’re being held back. Do you really want to go any
faster? No. It’s just that there’s someone in front of you. Which means that it
is at least related to my problem with hurry up, not yet!
Nothing is stopping me from moving forward, except for the
voice in my head saying, “You can’t. It’s Christmas.” You might not want
Christmas to be over, but there are a lot of people who are ready for 2020 to
be over. On January 1, 2021, we want to wake up to a world with no COVID-19, no
political unrest, and none of the traumas, trials, and tribulations of 2020. And
we know we’re going to be disappointed.
But we need to put the disappointment in the background and
focus on what lies ahead. At the end of every year, I struggle with writing
goals for the next year. For a long time, I did it knowing I would fail,
because I was supposed to set goals. This year, probably because of the virus,
I want to write goals because I need to move forward.
I haven’t written them yet. I’m afraid to write goals that
are either too small or too large, but just as I needed to have lights in the windows,
I need to begin praying for 2021 to be bigger than 2020. The phrases that have
come to mind are “getting on my feet,” “bowing the knee” and “hitting the
ground running.”
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