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             Now there was a Pharisee, a man named Nicodemus who was a member of the Jewish ruling council. He came to Jesus at night and said, “Rabbi, we know that you are a teacher who has come from God. For no one could perform the signs you are doing if God were not with him.”

Jesus replied, “Very truly I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again.”

“How can someone be born when they are old?” Nicodemus asked. “Surely they cannot enter a second time into their mother’s womb to be born!”

Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.” (John 3:1-8)

 

One of the things I love about this passage is that Jesus tosses the customary courtesies in the fire. There should have been exchanges of compliments for the first few minutes, maybe an inquiry about the day or one’s family, a small snack for the guest, and eventually Nicodemus would get around to asking a polite question or two, working his way toward harder topics. Just before dawn, he’d slink off so no one would see that he’d been there. And maybe some of that did happen, but John didn’t choose to record it.

But it sounds like Jesus welcomed Nicodemus in, invited him to sit down and hit him with the need to be born again. And Nicodemus, being a good materialist, is flummoxed.

Another factor that may have played a part here is what I’ll call the “You first” idea. Back in the seventies, work was done to try to bring Egypt and Israel to a level of peaceful coexistence. Anwar Sadat and Menachem Begin joined Jimmy Carter for a conference. At one point, they were walking toward a door, and suddenly, a sort of dance was going on, with Sadat and Begin each trying to hold the door and say, “You first.” The idea was that within their cultures, the one ushering the others through the door was in charge. In a sense, Nicodemus was taking charge, establishing his control of the meeting. He may have been so used to this behavior that he didn’t even notice.

          Jesus deviated from the script. Some might suggest that Jesus was being a control freak, but had he gone along with Nicodemus’ agenda, Nicodemus would probably never have learned what he most needed to learn. Jesus took on the role of leader and teacher – the role Nicodemus was accustomed to taking. And he cut through the courtesies to shake up the Pharisee’s worldview. The one who is part of the kingdom of Heaven is the one who is born again. Materialist Nicodemus can’t fathom this. Maybe because he is surprised, he can’t understand the metaphor.

          This is what the kingdom of God is like. It doesn’t always work according to our culture, customs, or expectations. What God says or does in our lives may be done to cut through to the heart of the matter, especially if we tend to think that we’re in charge.