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Don't Tear Down Your Own House


The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. (Proverbs 14:1)

          The research keeps reaching the same conclusion: single parenthood (and especially single motherhood) is harmful to the woman and to society. The Washington Post published an article some time ago that points out that it’s likely not just marriage that helps, but that it’s a certain type of marriage. That type of marriage is not the sort one often finds in poverty-ridden areas with high incarceration rates.[1] In social media, we keep being told that it’s wrong to shame these poor women, who are struggling against extreme odds. I agree. But I’ve noticed that the same sort of instability is found among the “rich and famous.” But I’ve noticed over the past twenty years or so that rather than address the problems these women face, rather than learning from their misfortune, the middle-class is emulating them. When I was growing up, I sometimes heard “If your friends were jumping off a bridge would you jump, too?” This was pre-bungee-line and the like, so the point was more obvious then than it is now. Today, when all the evidence points to the harm of single-parenthood, our society is promoting it. We are tearing down our own houses. When I bring up the statistics, people tell me, “We can’t all live that way….” They may be right, we may not all be able to live that way. We may not all be able to live malaria or ebola-free, either, but I don’t hear people singing the praises of living a lifestyle that makes contracting one of them likely.


[1] https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/04/10/the-relationship-between-single-mothers-and-poverty-is-not-as-simple-as-it-seems/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.6671f1277bfe

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