And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.(Philippian 4:19)
(This was written through the day yesterday. I got a good night's sleep last night)
It’s 4:22 am, and tonight has been a corker. Right after I crawled into bed, the electricity went out. My investigation revealed a melted plug where the cord from the motorhome plugs into the electrical service. No electricity until I get it repaired. Small problem there, the propane-powered furnaces stopped working at least a year ago. Our heat comes from electric space heaters, which may be part of why the plug melted. (I hope not, but at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised.) I put an extra blanket on Dad and went back to bed, only to have him call me to check his pulse. His pulse and blood pressure were elevated, and he insisted he wanted to go to the hospital even though I had a Hospice nurse on the way.
The ambulance crew said his blood pressure wasn’t elevated enough to be considered a problem, if they took him to the hospital, the Emergency room would likely kick him out in an hour or two. So, now we’re in the hospital, and the doctor says an enzyme is elevated that is usually elevated in association with heart attacks. Past, present, future – it’s impossible for me to know. Dad’s dementia is on over-drive. I asked him if he wanted to stay in the hospital or go home and be treated by Hospice, and he said he wanted to stay here, but now he’s denying that. Full blown delusion reigns. We’re waiting for a room.
And somehow, in all that, I’m supposed to find that my God will supply all my needs according to the riches of hi goy in Christ Jesus, and not just my needs but also Dad’s. I don’t know what that’s going to look like.
I know things I’d like it to mean. Right now, it would mean either health or heaven for Dad. It would mean a decent night’s sleep, or day’s sleep. It would mean the electrical cord is repaired at a reasonable price. It would mean a computer that isn’t possessed by gremlins. (The reason I didn't post an entry yesterday morning)
At the beginning of December, I decided that I only had to make it to the end of December. After that I only have to make it through January, and so on. And somehow, in spite of all the chaos of the past thirty-six hours, in spite of all that went wrong, my needs have been met because the reality isn’t that my need was for everything to go right. My need was for the capacity to face my circumstances. Things are better than they were.
The ambulance crew said his blood pressure wasn’t elevated enough to be considered a problem, if they took him to the hospital, the Emergency room would likely kick him out in an hour or two. So, now we’re in the hospital, and the doctor says an enzyme is elevated that is usually elevated in association with heart attacks. Past, present, future – it’s impossible for me to know. Dad’s dementia is on over-drive. I asked him if he wanted to stay in the hospital or go home and be treated by Hospice, and he said he wanted to stay here, but now he’s denying that. Full blown delusion reigns. We’re waiting for a room.
And somehow, in all that, I’m supposed to find that my God will supply all my needs according to the riches of hi goy in Christ Jesus, and not just my needs but also Dad’s. I don’t know what that’s going to look like.
I know things I’d like it to mean. Right now, it would mean either health or heaven for Dad. It would mean a decent night’s sleep, or day’s sleep. It would mean the electrical cord is repaired at a reasonable price. It would mean a computer that isn’t possessed by gremlins. (The reason I didn't post an entry yesterday morning)
At the beginning of December, I decided that I only had to make it to the end of December. After that I only have to make it through January, and so on. And somehow, in spite of all the chaos of the past thirty-six hours, in spite of all that went wrong, my needs have been met because the reality isn’t that my need was for everything to go right. My need was for the capacity to face my circumstances. Things are better than they were.
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