Kindness and Compassion

          Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 5:31-32)

           Some people think I’m a strong person. Some people think you’re a strong person. Some people think I’m a flaming idiot. Some think you’re a flaming idiot. The issue here isn’t whether I or you are actually strong or flaming idiots. We’re not talking about reality. We’re discussing perceptions. The reality is that we are both flaming idiots and strong. To the extent that we are perceived as being strong, we’re seen as not needing kindness (lending others your strength) or compassion (pity, assistance.) To the extent we’re seen as flaming idiots, we don’t deserve kindness (Oh, maybe a minimum of politeness, but not kindness) or compassion. If we don’t march in goose-step with someone else’s ideology, we don’t deserve to be treated like a human (let alone anything deemed superior to a human.)

          OK, by now, if you know me, you know where this is going. You’ve seen the memes… if you aren’t military personnel in the Middle East, braving temperatures above 100 F, if you have a roof over your head, or a job, or are in any way better off than anyone else on the planet, you don’t have a right to feel down, because somewhere in the world, someone has it worse. So you’re supposed to get over yourself and your bad perspective and stop seeking kindness or compassion from anyone because your sorry state isn’t sorry enough to meet the required depths of misery. Stop your crying or they’ll give you something to cry about!

          Right now, with a pandemic circling the globe in search of victims, a lot of us are feeling a little vulnerable. I’m not worried about getting sick or dying. My main stressors at the moment are old and familiar. I’m changing residences in a week. Am I going to be able to find a hotel? Food? Rest stops? When I get home, am I going to be able to find a job? Am I going to be able to effectively market my story? Am I going… notice something there? It’s all future tense. There’s nothing I can do about any of them right now. Even getting ready to leave has to be postponed to some extent. All I can do is think about it over and over and over. Anticipation is not only greater than reality, it’s a nasty task-master.

           This morning, it comes to mind that one of the reasons I do handicrafts is because it gives my mind something to focus on instead of the things in the future about which I can’t yet do anything. I also find myself thinking about people like Robin Williams who committed suicide. Often, people say of such individuals that they seemed so strong. What this tells me is that the strong need kindness and compassion just as much (perhaps more) than the weak.

          So, who are the “strong” people in your life? In this time of stress, they need prayer. Who are the “weak” people in your life? Right now, those whose health is not good (in general), those who are being treated for chronic diseases and illnesses, those who are 60 or older, those with lung problems (including asthma.) Other weak folks are those who live alone, those who don’t have a job, and those whose job involves people and their suffering (including medical personnel, pastors, social workers, city, township, county, state, and federal decision-makers.) They all need prayers, and they may need them more than those who are obviously “weak” do because they tend to be forgotten – the weak person’s weakness reminds us. The strong person’s strength lets prayer slip our minds.

          What to pray? Pray for their strength, endurance, hope and faith. Pray for wisdom, direction, and attitude! Pray that their unseen needs would be met. Ask them what their needs are – and don’t be put off by “I’m fine.” One of their needs is probably to be assured, or even convinced, that they matter, too. They need to be reminded (perhaps often!) that they are worthy of your kindness and compassion.

          As for me, I have five years’ experience with the “call of Abram.” I know my weakness right now is the anticipation of the unknown. The prayers I need are, as always, for wisdom, direction, and attitude – and for the completion of projects so that when I do leave here, it’s with a clean slate for the year, even if the things on the slate are busy-work.