Confession

             Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city. (Proverbs 16:32)

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (Romans 12:12)

 

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. (Matthew 6:12)

 

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. (Matthew 18:21-22)

 

Guilty. Yesterday, my patience was tried, and I showed myself lacking. Short version of the story: I put one of my accounts on seasonal hold back in October. I heard nothing from the company until January, when they charged me for a regular month’s service. I called the company, was told that my account wasn’t on vacation hold, but by the end of the call, that the vacation hold had been established. In February, I got a bill for two months service. I called and talked to someone, explaining again, and a supervisor was brought in to help fix things. Then I started getting “if you don’t pay, we’re going to shut off your service” calls, and a “I’m calling to get you to pay your bill” calls. I told the woman on the latter call that the account was supposed to be on vacation hold, that the problem was not mine, it was theirs, and that they were to stop calling me. I posted a comment on their Facebook site asking if there was someone competent with whom I could discuss the matter. Nothing. I got a call yesterday saying that my account has been turned off and that I not only owed the back charges, but that there would be a fee to reestablish service. I talked to three more people yesterday, the last of whom basically told me that I was out of line for my irritation, and that someone had tried to contact me (while we’d been talking, as it turned out. I heard the beep saying I had another call) and that I would have to find the information on my voice mail and call that person as she was no longer able to help me. I did so. That person has since called me back and told me the whole thing was going to be resolved. A half hour ago, I got a phone call saying that my account had been shut down until I pay my bill.
          Now, humanly speaking, it’s entirely understandable that I should be irritated. I have acted in good faith with the company, tried to address the situation multiple times politely. I’ve been doing this seasonal hold thing for five years now. It’s not my fault and even if it is not the fault of the individual employees to whom I spoke, it is the fault of the company. I deserve to be irritated.

But was I patient with each person I spoke with yesterday? Was I patient with the organization as a whole? I can’t say I was. My goal here isn’t to beat myself up. It’s a time of thoughtfulness and processing. I don’t want to let go and forget because history repeats itself because we don’t learn the first time. To learn from our mistakes, we have to be sufficiently aware to trigger the memory next time we face it.