What Are You Doing Here?

            There he went into a cave and spent the night. And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?” (I Kings 19:9) 

          Elijah had taken on the 450 prophets of Baal, had prayed for and received rain, and outrun Ahab, but when Jezebel threatened his life, he got scared and ran away. An angel ministered to him and then he traveled 40 days to get to Mount Horeb. That’s what leads up to this verse. What follows it is the story of the wind, earthquake, and fire that God was not in, followed by the still, small voice, which Elijah recognized as being from the Lord. And God asks him a second time, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

          Both times, Elijah told his tale of woe. He was all alone and the Israelites wanted to kill him. God instructs Elijah where to go and who to see, then informs him that He had reserved seven thousand Israelites who did not bow down to Baal.

          This verse was chosen because I realized yesterday that my attitude was a little like Elijah’s. “Woe is me. Life isn’t as easy as I thought it would be. I’m all alone trying to do whatever it is I’m trying to do.” I’m not telling you this to invite you to my pity party. Instead, it’s more about dealing with our pity parties when they happen.

          I think I need to camp on this story for a few days because I don’t think I’m “getting it.” The main thing I’m noticing is God asking, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” twice. I don’t get the impression that God’s tone is harsh, but I think one of the first keys is to ask ourselves what we’re doing in our pity party. What is really going on?

          Did you notice Elijah’s answer? Jezebel told him she was going to kill him – meaning her soldiers or assassins, not “all of Israel.” That’s not to say that there was no threat, but it’s not the truth. The other part of his answer was, “I’m all alone.” He was just as all alone when he took on the priests of Baal. He was upset and wasn’t thinking straight, so his answers don’t make sense.

          And God’s response to his answers? They seem to turn the focus on the last part of Elijah’s answer, the “I’m all alone” part. First, God visits Elijah. Next, he corrects the error in Elijah’s thinking. There are 7000 people like him. Finally, he sends him off to specific people, somewhere safe from Jezebel.

          In a book on toxic thinking, I read about speaking our two percent. When we talk to someone about something personal, we tend to leave out information that seems embarrassing or too personal. Quite often, that last little bit of information is the key to the whole thing. That is the statement or definition of the problem. I think Elijah’s two percent was “I’m all alone.” And as I’ve considered my own current pity party, I hear that same echo.

          Someone asked a question about my hopes and dreams, and part of my answer had to do with dreaming that I’d find some people who would read my stories and “get” half of the stuff that I included in them. In other words, the two percent of what I’m doing here is feeling alone and unappreciated, just like Elijah.

          Once we answer “What are you doing here, Elijah” with that last two percent that defines the problem, the next thing God does is show up, not in some big dramatic way, but in a still small voice – some small way. We may need to look and listen. But God then takes Elijah back to the problem and corrects the lie that Elijah believed.

          Some folks say that we should just “be with” those who are hurting – and being with is part of the answer, but it’s not enough to be with, because that doesn’t help them solve the problem and when the problem is our stinking thinking, someone “being with” us won’t help.

          As I said I need to think about this a lot more – but I think I need to ask myself “What are you doing here, Karen,” a lot more often.