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Not As I Will...

           Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” … He went away a second time and prayed, “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.” (Matthew 26:39 & 42)

This should have been the passage Thursday. Then it would have fit into the traditional timeline. Still, it’s a good passage for the when-the-going-gets-tough theme. Once again, Jesus gives us the model for facing pain, struggle, and difficulties. 1) He fell with His face to the ground. 2) He prayed that God would take the tough-going away, 3) He chose God’s will over His own and went through the tough-going.

Later the same evening, He asks Peter and the disciples if they didn’t realize that He could ask His Father, and His Father would put an army of angels at His disposal (as if His word would not have been enough.) I have wondered about that. Would the Father have sent the angels when it would have marked the failure of the plan? Perhaps. Perhaps not. But if Jesus had not chosen to abide in God’s will instead of His own, His death would not have accomplished what it did. The sacrifice had to be sinless.

There are times when I have prayed the “Not as I will, but as You will” prayer. They’re never anywhere near as big a crisis as Jesus faced in Gethsemane, but the point with Jesus is that every second of every day was “as You will.” This was just the hardest. I can’t tell you what my crises were. I know I have prayed that many times while walking. I know I have prayed its sister prayer “I bend the knee” while my knees ached. I know I must have been praying about my circumstances and I know what some of my circumstances have been, but I don’t remember what I prayed it about specifically.

What I remember is that there are times when the denial, the anger, the depression, and the bargaining must end, and acceptance, begin.

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