A shiggaion of David, which he sang to the Lord concerning Cush, a Benjamite.
Lord my God, I
take refuge in you; save and deliver me from all who pursue me, (Psalm
7:1)
I haven’t exactly been
reading a book about enneagrams. I’ve been sticking my toe into the pool, and
not finding a desire to jump in. But this book attempts to address the issue of
what the various types do when stressed. This morning, that idea walked up and
introduced itself to a word: refuge (a condition of being safe or
sheltered from pursuit, danger, or trouble. From Latin terms meaning “back” and
“to flee.”) Our refuge may not be a stone keep with walls and a moat or a cave
that can only be approached along a narrow ledge.
It could be a condition
or an activity. Some folks think being around other people is their safe place.
For others, it’s being at home. Sometimes, it’s feeding an addiction. As I thought
about this, one of my recurrent prayers came to mind: “But God, You don’t understand.
I don’t understand.” Put aside the fact that God does understand. This issue is
that my not understanding constitutes a crisis. Another prayer doesn’t have
quite the same exactitude of wording, but it boils down to “I am (or things
are) out of control. Help!” Again, the issue is that things aren’t going the
way I want them to.
My standard prayer
request may be intertwined with these: wisdom, direction, and attitude. And I
find myself wishing I could figure out how to build a “monastery garden.” I
doubt my idea has anything to do with the gardens of medieval monasteries. I
suspect it’s a “self-tending” garden where I can go to solve or escape all my
problems. I probably have a few other mantras, but these should give you enough
of an idea to begin to identify your own preferred refuges.
These refuges might not
be bad in and of themselves – or they might be bad even at the best of times.
God may even lead us to one or more of them as a place to meet Him. But the
point is that when our refuges aren’t God, they’re going to fail, and if we’re
not careful, they may become idols.
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