“Who are
you?” they asked.
“Just what I have been claiming all
along,” Jesus replied. “I have much to say in judgment of you. But he who sent
me is reliable, and what I have heard from him I tell the world.” So Jesus said, “When you have lifted up
the Son of Man, then you will know that I am └ the one I claim to be┘[1]
and that I do nothing on my own but speak just
what the Father has taught me. The one who sent me is with me; he has not left
me alone, for I always do what pleases him.” (John 8:25-29)
If you take a good personality type test, or if you are ever questioned
in any depth by the police, you discover that they ask the same basic questions
over and over in different ways. It's their job to try to get at the truth.
Sometimes that involves uncovering the lies that we're telling them. Sometimes
that involves uncovering the lies that we tell ourselves. The Pharisees were
doing their job: trying to find inconsistencies in Jesus' story. In a way, I
can't blame them for asking the same question over and over. At the same time, I
can't help but think of a paraphrase of a well-known question: "What part
of 'I AM' did you not understand the first,...second,...tenth time?" I
also can't help but think of a pop-psychology definition of insanity:
"Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
Of
course, when we are the ones who keep asking the same question, it's a little
different, isn't it? It was the Pharisee's job to doubt. It was also their
nature, and it is our nature. The answer Jesus gives is the right answer for
them, and for us. When we exalt (lift up) Jesus, we will know. When it becomes
about His glory and not ours, then we will know. It was when they had Him
crucified, just as He'd foretold, that they would know. It was when He didn't
stay dead that they would know. There are many who say, "Show me God and
then I'll believe," or "Show me a miracle and then I'll never doubt
again." The truth is that the Jews had all the plagues on Egypt and the
crossing of the Red Sea, and God on the mountain within sight of camp when they
made the golden calf. The Pharisees had the Torah with all the prophecies, and
all Jesus' miracles and still they rejected. Our doubt is not about the quality
or quantity of the evidence. It's about our fallen human nature.
When
we doubt, then, our response should be twofold. First, we should lift up Jesus.
Secondly, we should analyze the doubt. Is it a real question that can be
investigated, or is it just human nature expressing itself? If it's a real
question, then we should investigate the answer to the best of our ability.
That's what they teach on shows like CSI. You follow the evidence. You go where
the evidence leads even if it doesn't make sense, because eventually, it will.
That's what the Pharisees refused to do. Instead, they followed their feelings
of doubt. Logic and answers couldn't reduce or eliminate it.
The
doubts that are our fallen human nature tend to be amorphous anxiety - negative
emotions tied to will-o'-the-wisps of the mind (AKA brain fog.) If we focus on
it, we exalt it and we wander endlessly. If we follow the evidence, if we exalt
what the evidence shows, then we will overcome the doubt.
[1] The phrase in
the brackets is not included in the Greek manuscripts of this text. They were
inserted in order to help us understand what the Greek expresses. I think it's
more powerful without it. "“When you have lifted up the
Son of Man, then you will know that I am and that I
do nothing on my own but speak just what the Father has taught me."
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