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This Group Did This...

           Eliashib the high priest and his fellow priests went to work and rebuilt the Sheep Gate. They dedicated it and set its doors in place, building as far as the Tower of the Hundred, which they dedicated, and as far as the Tower of Hananel. and between the room above the corner and the Sheep Gate the goldsmiths and merchants made repairs. (Nehemiah 3:1 & 32)

Chapter three of Nehemiah is rather like the begats of Genesis 5 or the genealogy of Jesus. There are reasons that they are important, but for our purposes, we know that various groups repaired various sections of the wall, probably located near their homes, so that they were building what would protect them and theirs. We have lists of goals, and we have lists of people to whom we might call for help with those goals. Some are professionals, but most will probably be friends and relatives.

Do you give all of the people on your list the task of helping you with all of your goals? I’m fairly sure your physician won’t really be willing to do much about your goal to paint the kitchen. Someone who eats anything and everything he/she wants and doesn’t work out isn’t likely to be a good choice to help you get in shape and eat more healthfully – except as a negative example, and you don’t need their assistance in that, just their existence.

As you consider who can or will help you in reaching your goals, there are things to consider. Do they have the time, wisdom, or reason to help you? How will they be compensated? Professionals deserve payment for services rendered. A spouse may be rewarded by a healthier, more mature, more competent and capable, or more loving significant other. The point is that as we seek help, we need to pick people who are willing and able to join us on our quests. Mercenaries (professionals we hire) may be of use as well, but there is little as predictable as the person you’ve asked to help you do something turning out to be the person who prevents its accomplishment.

Nehemiah set leaders to work on parts of the wall that would matter to them. He provided the supplies, and while it doesn’t say so, I strongly suspect he arranged to have the people involved trained. He would have set performance standards – this was what their well-built wall should look like and how it should behave. And he paid them. They ended up with a secure home, hidden behind the walls that would keep robbers and wild dogs out. They received recognition for their work that cut both ways. If they did well, they could bask in the glory of a good job, but if the wall collapsed, everyone would know who was responsible for the poor workmanship.

And quite honestly, family and friends are often not the best choices for a partner in a goal unless they have been through the same battle. Reaching goals can be exhausting. It can require a lot of time, effort, attention, and tolerance (of whining if nothing else.) People often find it more useful to join groups, whether it’s a writer’s group or weight management, or 12-step group. Even these can be hazardous to your achievement because those who are supposed to support you may struggle with your success, or lose patience with your failure, too.

No matter who helps you, they probably need to given supplies and trained in addition to being paid for their work in some manner. If you don’t set them up to win, you can’t blame them when you lose. 

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