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Defeat

             He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

             The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”

            Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake.  After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

            Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” (I Kings 19:10-13)

 

            The whole passage I’d like to examine is too long to quote here, but  you probably know the story. Elijah prophesied three years of drought. Near the end of that time, Elijah challenges the king, the people, and 400 priests of Baal to a contest. Whoever wins, the people will acknowledge as God.

                Baal’s priest put forth a good effort and put on a good show. Then Elijah ups the ante – having folks dig a trench around the altar and drench the sacrifice. One simple prayer and God’s fire consumes everything. Elijah tells the king to hurry home to avoid the storm, and outraces the king back to town.

            When Jezebel learned what happened, she threatens Elijah, who tucks tail and runs to Mt Horeb, where God asks him what he’s doing there. That brings us to the passage quoted above. When my pastor taught from it on Sunday, a phrase came to mind that he didn’t use: “Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.”

            Generally, we hear it the other way around. There’s no way the hero can win but somehow, he does. But in this story, there seems no way that Elijah can lose – until someone threatens him. And how often am I the same way? It doesn’t even take a queen threatening my life. I approved a novel for print and made some decorations for the trailer. Then I made the mistake of taking a picture of the decorations. They’re far from perfect. They don’t look like an artist made them. It didn’t take someone else failing to appreciate my genius to snatch failure from victory. It took me. By writing about it, I hope I can entrench the idea in my mind so the next time I sabotage myself, I’ll have the phrase to fall back on and maybe give myself the little bit of backbone needed to not run away.

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