Skip to main content

Three Words

             Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:21-33)

There is one general “submit to one another” command here. It is followed by two verses that instruct wives to submit to their husbands. After that, there are nine verses about husbands loving their wives. There are two basic ways to see this. First, in terms of which member of the couple is likely to have the harder time and need the most instruction. Secondly, the idea that to whom much is given, much will be required. If the husband is to be the head of the household, it is his responsibility to do his part more carefully, more fully, and with greater commitment than the rest of the household, to set the example for the rest. Now I will step down from that soapbox.

This passage was the subject of discussion in my Sunday School class, and several words were used that caught my attention. We have all heard of “unconditional” love. If I may be so bold, it seems to me to be seen as requiring us to say, “That’s OK, keep doing what you’re doing,” to the person we claim to love whether that person beats or rapes our child, slaughters 60 million people (like Chairman Mao)…no matter what they do, we must “love and accept” them.

The term the discussion leader used was a little different. He said, “uncompromising love.” I’m still not sure quite what to do with this term. It seems to have the same “unending love” concept, but (at least in my mind) it lacks the weakness by which the lover must accept, approve, or even celebrate whatever the beloved does or dictates. Uncompromising love says, “Because I love you, I will draw these lines beyond which you may not go.” In a quick search, I found a blogpost that discusses the idea: Teacher of Love: Uncompromising Love.

I still need to read that at least ten more times, but moving on, the second word that came up was that this passage describes teamwork. The third word was “competition.” Marriage and family are meant to be a team, with each member working for their own benefit by working for the benefit of the whole team. A great football player might wow us with his skill, but so interfere with the other members of his team that they lose the game. A football coach (or owner) can so dominate the team that they destroy it. Another team may have less spectacular athletes, but their ability to work together toward their mutual goal results in their victory over the “great” player’s team. Marriages and families can either be a team that cooperates or there can be one superstar who dominates all.

I suspect that we could say that what Scripture calls for us to do is to be uncompromising in our love as we put aside our dreams of superstardom in favor of building a team or building the team members. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Saved?

  I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” (John 10:28-30) “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, “I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’ ” (Matthew 7:21-23) Not at all! Let God be true, and every human being a liar. As it is written: “So that you may be proved right when you speak and prevail when you judge.” (Romans 3:4)   What conclusion do you draw when someone who was raised in a Christian family and church, perhaps even playing a significant role in a chur...
Post a Comment
Read more

Meditations of the Heart

  May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalm19:14)           As I started writing this post, I noted that the meditations of my heart are all over the mental landscape, from a hub where eight superhighways come together to a lunar or nuclear landscape. Do you see my error? The moment I read the word meditation , I think about thoughts. But what’s described here is the meditations of our hearts ; our wills.           While the meditations of our minds may be all over the place, the meditations of our wills tend to be a little more stable by the time we are adults. We no longer tend to want to pursue the ten separate careers we did in any given day as children. Part of this is humble acceptance of reality. We come to understand that we can’t do it all. I think another part of it is disappointmen...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Shepherd!

                 “I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me— just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep . (John 10:14) God said to Moses, “I am who I am. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I am has sent me to you.’” (Genesis 3:14) The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths     for his name’s sake. Even though I walk     through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil,     for you are with me; your rod and your staff,     they comfort me. (Psalm 23:1-4) For the Jews, it was politically incorrect to make claims about yourself as a teacher (or possibly as anything else.) Teachers were expected to take pride in the...
Post a Comment
Read more