Her Husband

             Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. (Proverbs 31:23)

Oh, I can hear the feminists groaning already.  Part of what makes her a Proverbs 31 woman is the social status of her husband? I admit, as a single, I feel a little uncomfortable with this. But what’s really being said here? This verse is in the middle of the verses shared yesterday. It’s in between the clothing in scarlet and purple and in strength and dignity. In a sense, then, one might say her husband is, by his connection with her, clothed in scarlet, purple, strength, and dignity. And she is, by her connection with him, respected in the city gate and among the elders/rulers of the land.

Those who go to the city gate (effectively the courthouse of the day) didn’t have to worry about this husband’s wife or children being involved in the incidents over which the elders judged, or that he would be corrupt or for sale, because his wife wouldn’t stand for it and made it “unnecessary.”

This all leads me, as a single, to wonder about my “husbands.” Am I the sort of person whose connection with someone or something brings respect to the person or thing? Is the church I attend seen as a positive thing because, after all, I go there and I wouldn’t go somewhere that wasn’t respectable? Is the place I work more respectable because I work there than it would be if I didn’t? Are any of the organizations I have been part of (including family) likely to say with pride or affection, “Karen is (or was once) one of us”?  

And, of course, these questions sets off my “I want to be invisible” response. While I would be mortified to find that a person, place, or thing was disrespected because of me (and I won’t say it’s not the case,) I would be terrified to discover that my “marriage” to the person, place, or thing was a reason (let alone the reason) for someone’s good opinion of it. This brings me back to “cross necklaces” and/or “bumper stickers.”  But, to be a Proverbs 31 woman…