Where?

             Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. (Psalm 139:7-12)

Normally, when I read this section of this psalm, I think in terms of rebellion against God. That’s certainly part of what’s here. It may be all of what’s here. But today, I’m thinking a little differently. When things go wrong in our lives, we absolutely turn toward God. Sometimes, however, I think we try to run away from the things that go wrong without noticing that God is in them. Or, we turn toward something out of habit, without realizing that God isn’t there. I’m wondering if maybe – just maybe – our fleeing from God might not be so much fleeing from God. We haven’t even stopped to ask God where He is. All we know is that this isn’t good. This is the reason why even people who follow God can ask “Where was God when…?” Those who don’t run away from Him know He was there when this happened.

                The thing is, while sometimes psalmists sang of God abandoning them or not being able to find God, when this psalmist in this psalm talks about fleeing from God’s presence, he never seems to tell God to leave him alone. What he keeps saying is that he knows God will be there. Yesterday’s section, he recognized God’s omniscience. Today, it’s His omnipresence. So, yes, we all flee God and think we can run away to somewhere that is safe from Him. But at the same time, sometimes, we run away from something else – little Promised Lands that we’re supposed to be conquering, little Gethsemanes, that irritating person, etc.

                The story of the Prodigal Son comes to mind. In that story, the father waited for his son to come home, and ran to him when he did. But God is better. He purchases the farm. He doesn’t remove the pigs, solve the problem, or make things easier. After all, the young man ran away. He made a bad choice, but he made it and until he is ready, doing more than overseeing won’t help. Nor would it be helpful if God stepped out of the clouds and said, “Ta Da! I’m here, I’m in charge.”

                Another story comes to mind: Elijah’s flight from Queen Jezebel. He’d just defeated four hundred priest of Baal. He’d just run a marathon ahead of King Ahab’s chariot. But when Queen Jezebel threatened his life, he ran again. Before he got to Mount Horeb, an angel saw to his needs. When he got there, God was waiting. Had God not been with Elijah when Queen Jezebel threatened him? Could God not have protected him? Was he running from God? Or from Jezebel, who was no threat to God? Was he running away from God, who was suddenly too weak to save him? Or was he running from the situation? Was he running to God, confident that he would find Him at Mt. Horeb, if nowhere else? Was Mt. Horeb “the far side of the sea”? Was the cave “the darkness”?

                Where is your safe place? Your far side of the sea, or the darkness in which you try to hide? I think mine is my home and my garden, and right now, they aren’t feeling safe.  That means only God is left. Was I running from Him? Not on purpose.