Immorality

          Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,

“Never will I leave you;
    never will I forsake you.”

So we say with confidence,

“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
    What can mere mortals do to me?” (Hebrews 13:4-6)

          Why does God have to meddle? That’s what one pastor I know called it any time he started speaking about sins. He attributed the perspective to those who are comfortable in their sins, who want a pastor that always talks about happy things and good self-esteems. The answer, of course, is that the things that we think we should be left alone to enjoy – the subjects of the meddling – are sins that aren’t as good for us, or to us, or for or to others as we want to believe. We’re back to the devil saying, “You shall not surely die…” So, we bite, and we die, and we don’t have the sense any more to hide from God. We stand in judgment of the “bad and ugly” God who is just going to have to step down off His soap box and accept that we can’t all live His way, or that there really “nothing wrong” with the way we’ve decided to live. (By the way, isn’t that meddling on our part? Telling God how He should live?)
          “We can’t all live that way,” we’re told. We need sex. The significant other who provides it doesn’t happen to fit the standards listed in Scripture. He/she doesn’t understand us or doesn’t satisfy us. Doesn’t God want us to be happy? Why should we look elsewhere? And what if the one who makes us feel good isn’t our spouse, isn’t of the “opposite” cis-gender…? How can it be wrong to ignore what the Bible says if that other makes us feel good?  According to one article, people use drugs and alcohol for a variety of reasons:
          to relax
          for enjoyment
          to be part of a group
          sometimes to avoid physical and/or psychological pain
          experiment out of a sense of curiosity
          excitement
          rebellion 
          To cope with problems
          To relieve stress
          To overcome boredom.( https://adf.org.au/insights/why-do-people-use-alcohol-and-other-drugs/)

          The article claims that most people who use don’t become addicted, but another source gives this extensive list of signs of addiction:
         Over-active or under-active (depending on the drug)

               Repetitive speech patterns

               Dilated pupils, red eyes

               Excessive sniffing and runny nose (not attributable to a cold

               Looking pale or undernourished  

               Clothes do not fit the same

               Weight loss 

               Change in eating habits

               Unusual odors or body odor due to lack of personal hygiene

               Missing work/school

               Work/school problems 

               Missing important engagements 

               Isolating/secretive about activities

               Disrupted sleep patterns 

               Legal problems

               Relationship/marital problems 

               Financial problems (e.g. always needing money)

               Conversations dominated by using or drug/alcohol related topic

               Irritability/Argumentative

               Defensiveness 

               Inability to deal with stress

               Loss of interest in activities/people that used to be part of their lives 

               Obnoxious

               Silly 

               Confused easily

               Denial

               Rationalizing – Offering alibis, excuses, justifications, or other explanations for their using behavior

               Minimization – Admitting superficially to the problem but not admitting to the seriousness or full scope of the behavior or consequences 

               Blaming – Placing the blame for the behavior on someone else or some event

               Diversion – Changing the subject to avoid discussing the topic

               The Three Cs of Addiction: Loss of control over the amount and frequency of use; craving and compulsive using, and continued use in the face of adverse consequences. 

               So, if (as the Three Cs describe it) we are craving and compulsively using something or someone, if we need sex, or our day revolves around smoking weed, or around eating our next meal (or snack), or around watching  this show or that, or reading the next Fifty Shades book. If something other than God is our coping mechanism, If some way other than God’s way is our means to whatever end… it’s not good for us, and it’s not good for those who use as that means.

Justifying something based on our “needs” or desires is dangerous. Pedophiles claim to love children. They claim their “need” for children is natural. Rapists “need” to put their victims in their place, to punish them, or harm them in order to be aroused. Serial killers may “need” to kill. Addicts “need” their next fix. And none of them think anyone else should have the right to tell them “no.” It’s not fair to expect them to live by the same standards as everyone else. So “needs” and “desires” are not sufficient to make something right.

          Even “it doesn’t harm anyone” isn’t sufficient. Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Elixir was a household staple in Victorian homes. It contained morphine. Women also used to use arsenic as a beauty treatment. They used to think electro-shock therapy helped the insane. Science and medical doctors did things they thought helpful, useful, and effective  - until they figured out they weren’t really good things. So how do we know that what is currently declared to be good actually is? Parents addicted their kids to morphine thinking they were doing them a favor, thinking that they were loving them. According to Professor Jonathan Haidt, over the past twenty years, parents have addicted their children to safety, and we’re just beginning to discover the harm that did. Self-esteem and self-fulfillment have been turned into drugs (OK, technically, they’ve always been drugs.) Back in 1985, Pat Benatar released a song “(Stop Using) Sex As A Weapon,” and not only did not not listen to her, but we did listen (and are still listening) to those who, a generation earlier, taught us that if we can’t be with the one we love, we should love the one we’re with – or otherwise use sex as a drug. Yeah, that can’t possibly be harmful to anyone.

Morality isn’t about making us miserable. It’s about making us strong. It’s not about making us feel good, it’s about doing what is in the best interest of all involved. Immorality is always about feeling good, about needs, and about our knowing better that God that if we take a bite, we shall not surely die, but rather, we will be like God.

        And I guess we'll come back to the rest of the passage tomorrow.