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"As Long As No One Gets Hurt"


Although I hope to come to you soon, I am writing you these instructions so that, if I am delayed, you will know how people ought to conduct themselves in God’s household, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of the truth. (I Timothy 3:14-15) 

One of my Sunday School classes is going through a DVD series by Andy Stanley, called “Right In The Eye.”[1] It’s a study of the book of Judges, which tells the history of Israel in a time in which everyone did what was right in their own eyes. As he describes it, people considered it their right to do what they want, when and where they want, with whom they want, and how they want, “as long as no one gets hurt.” Sound familiar?
In today’s passage, Paul said he wanted Timothy to know how people should conduct themselves in the household of God, (AKA, the Church.) In other words, there was a way in which people should conduct themselves. Too often, I hear people who claim to be Christians proclaim that it’s their life, they’re going to live it the way they want to and anyone who disapproves can just get out.
The thing is, how do you know whether something is going to hurt the participants? Of course, no one is meant to end up in the hospital. Any harm that does take place wasn’t intended. No one is meant to end up in jail. No harm, no foul, right? All it takes is good intentions, right?  Andy asked a question that I think needs to be answered even more than “Who is it going to hurt?”: Who is it going to help?
That caught my attention because I’ve asked it a different way. As I’ve shared before, I had a supervisor who said that because something wasn’t entirely unethical, it was OK. If what you are doing is only 99% evil, is it evil? If it’s only 80% evil…47% evil…13% evil? What if it is 0% not evil. Does that mean that it is good? I don’t pry your fingers from the ledge. That’s not doing evil. If I grabbed your wrists and pulled you to safety, that would be good. What if I don’t do anything? Doing good is more than not doing evil. In the same way, I think that “helping someone” is more than “not hurting” them.
A classic example today is sex outside of marriage. The science is pretty settled on this one. The best, most helpful, most healthful, most prosperous model for a family is one man, plus one woman in a legally and socially defined relationship, plus children. A single mother household, or a single father household, or multiple fathers or multiple mothers (for whatever reason) is not as beneficial to a family. There are exceptions, of course, but in general even if the parents are good parents, any other set up is not as good as one man plus one woman, plus children in a legally and socially defined relationship plus children. Those other set ups may not intend to do harm. They may intend to do good, but how much less than 100% good can something be without doing harm?
This means that when Paul wrote about how we should behave in the household of God, he wasn’t writing about something optional. Any other way of behaving, even those that supposedly don’t harm anyone, will ultimately not be as good – will ultimately be less beneficial to the participants. This is why he needed to instruct Timothy.



[1] http://rightintheeye.org/

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