Skip to main content

My Thoughts


O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
You understand my thought from afar. (Psalm 139:1-2)

          This is one of my top favorites. I can’t put them in any numerical order and proclaim a specific verse my absolute favorite, but this psalm is in contention, and the third line above is the lynchpin on which the whole song turns for me. Other folks love the part about being knitted together in their mother’s womb, and I love that verse, too. But this one is more personal.
         Knitting and crocheting are means of manufacture. I know that some folks make magnificent stuff, but it’s still manufacturing. In my mind, the verse above can be pictured as God sitting on the throne doing His God stuff with hosts of angels doing their angels stuff. God holds up a finger and says, “One moment, please. Karen is having a thought. I want to hear it.” Because He’s God, He can do His God stuff and pause for every thought every person thinks without missing a beat. My thoughts mattering means more to me than my manufacturing process.
          There are two bad directions a person can go with this idea. The first is to resent that God intrudes on your thoughts. The second is to think that everything, including God, revolves around you. Neither of those could find a home in this Psalm.
          There also seems to be a good direction a person – at least this person – can go. “Impostor Syndrome is a pervasive feeling of self-doubt, insecurity, or fraudulence despite often overwhelming evidence to the contrary.[1] It’s the assurance that as soon as people find out what a freak or a fake you are, they won’t like you anymore, and, even worse, they might tell everyone else.
          What this passage says is that there is no possibility of God being faked out. It’s humbling to think that He knows it all. He knows the worst and still loves. God is god enough to overcome the worst we are. He can face our thoughts without cringing, crying, or walking away. It’s freeing when one doesn’t have to hide behind a mask

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Right Road

          Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. (Psalm 139:7-12)                  For years before GPSes existed, I told people I wanted something in my car that would tell me, “Turn left in half a mile…turn left in a quarter mile…turn left in 500 feet… turn left in 100 feet…turn left now …You missed the turn, Dummy!” The problem isn’t necessarily that I get lost so much as I’m afraid I’ll get lost. I don’t want to have to spend my whole trip stressing over the next turn. I have the same problem with my spiritual journey.   
Post a Comment
Read more

Died as a Ransom

                 For this reason Christ is the mediator of a new covenant, that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance—now that he has died as a ransom to set them free from the sins committed under the first covenant. (Hebrews 9:15)                  This is something I’d really rather not think about but here it is and it’s important. I was reading in Bold Love about seeking revenge.  The author wrote of seeking justice when a supposed Christian does something sinful, harmful, and/or horrific, like sexually abusing a daughter.  And the thought that came to mind was of God asking if Jesus’ death was sufficient payment to me for the sin committed against me.                I have no specific longing for revenge, vengeance, or justice. I’m sure there are some lurking somewhere in my heart, but this wasn’t a response to one. It was more a question of principle. Jesus’ death was sufficient payment for to God for our sins.  That’s the standard Sunday Schoo
1 comment
Read more

Out of the Depths

  Out of the depths I have cried to You, Lord. Lord, hear my voice! Let Your ears be attentive to the sound of my pleadings.   If You, Lord, were to keep account of guilty deeds, Lord, who could stand? But there is forgiveness with You, so that You may be revered. I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and I wait for His word. My soul waits in hope for the Lord more than the watchmen for the morning; Yes, more than the watchmen for the morning. Israel, wait for the Lord; for with the Lord there is mercy, and with Him is abundant redemption. And He will redeem Israel from all his guilty deeds . (Psalm 130)             I like Mr. Peterson’s interpretation of the first line. “The bottom has fallen out of my life!” Of course, the problem for some of us is the fact that we’re drama queens, and/or we’re weak. Any time anything happens that disturbs our sense of mastery and control, the bottom has fallen out of our lives. If the past couple of days have taught me anything, they’ve t
1 comment
Read more