Warm and Fuzzy

Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy. (Proverbs 27:6)

          Today’s subtopic from Love As A Way of Life is honesty. Mention honesty, however, and you’re likely to be told to tone it down. Make it nice. Give a winner’s ribbon to the person who comes in last. Give money to someone who hasn’t earned it. Tell whatever lie you need to so that the person you claim to love feels good about himself/herself.  You’ll also get told, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Perhaps the problem is that we should care enough to tell them the truth even if it makes us look uncaring. It should never be our goal to hurt or harm anyone, but not telling someone the truth is hurting them.

 Lying to people is killing them with thousands of tiny stabs. None might kill them by itself, but infections are more likely, scarring is guaranteed, and the slow loss of blood from the accumulation of stabs steals life.

Dr. Chapman spends part of the chapter reviewing the love habits we’ve been discussing: patience, forgiveness, courtesy, humility, and generosity, and points out that these must be integrated into our honesty. This is, to some extent, what I’ve been saying about the whole “Stay home. Wear a mask. Social distance” thing. The problem is not that I disagree with the idea of wearing a mask. I’m willing to wear a mask. But those who are verbally attacking other people with the (possible) truth that masks are needed are not loving anyone.

I’m an arguer. I don’t think of myself as being much good at the sort of love that focuses on peoples’ feelings. I get told – often – how hateful I am because I don’t let others be right and because I think being right is more important than someone feeling “warm and fuzzy.”

If you can be nice, sweet, and wonderful – do so. But as you seek to be warm and fuzzy, remember: mold is warm and fuzzy – and it makes what it grows into useless.