The Heart

             The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?

“I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward each person according to their conduct, according to what their deeds deserve.” (Jeremiah 17:9-10)

 

You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’  But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell. (Matthew 5:21-22

 

This verse is at the heart of one of the problems we have with ourselves. So much of who we are comes from parts of ourselves over which we have no real control. Keeping in mind that the heart is the seat of the will. How much control do you really have?

You go to the store with a list of things. Do you go home with only the items on the list?

You go to a restaurant claiming you’re not going to get dessert. Even better, you go to a buffet. Do you eat healthfully? Do you get dessert?

Pick your weakness – office supply stores, craft stores, bookstores, garden centers, home centers… do you tend to overspend?

One drink, one potato chip, one ______ won’t hurt. Do you stop at one?

Tomorrow, you’re going to start going to the gym. How long does that last?

You’re not going to get angry, lose patience, drive over the speed limit…

We like to think we’re good, strong people. People who have known me know that I can spend 20 years and thousands of dollars on a project. I’m writing my fourth novel. I lost 90 lbs. at one point. There is no reason why I shouldn’t be a leader somewhere. In fact, I have been – and generally speaking, I implode. Somehow, my will isn’t strong enough at the right time. We like to think we understand our hearts, our wills, our responses to things, but I don’t think I’m alone in my failure to get – and keep – it all together.

God says that He searches our hearts and examines our minds. He understands why we do what we do. Today’s passage says that He rewards each person according to their conduct. But what does that mean? It’s easy to say that – for example, He’s going to punish someone who commits murder and reward someone who saves lives. But what about the person who dies on his way to commit murder? Or the person who wants to commit murder but can’t figure out how to do it? Or who lacks the courage? In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus makes it clear that hatred will be judged, even if it only comes out in words, and even if it hides in the heart.

Similarly, then, the willingness or desire to do good, even if the attempt fails or the opportunity never arises. And, in the same way, God understands when we do something for selfish or hateful motives, no matter how good the thing we do may look to us or to others. And, He understands when something that we may not even remember produces a reaction we don’t understand.

And when we don’t understand, that’s a perfect opportunity to talk to God about it.