If only you, God, would slay the wicked! Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty! They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord, and abhor those who are in rebellion against you? I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies.
Search
me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if
there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:19-24)
The
first paragraph of today’s passage sounds like David was plucking away at his
harp, praising God, and opened his eyes to see a group of evil men skulking
about. It’s an ugly interruption to something beautiful. Yes,
we’re supposed to hate evil, but it seems as if David got majorly triggered.
It’s
sort of like my previous Shiba, Honey. If you touched her without speaking to
her or otherwise letting her know you were there, she was likely to attack. After
a few seconds, you would see her mind switch on with an “Oh, it’s you. OK.” Only
Honey didn’t think she’d done anything wrong. I’m not sure she even remembered
what she’d done. David, on the other hand, seemed to doubt. Instead of
returning to the lofty heights of his praise, he seems to gaze into the murky
depths of his soul.
But
isn’t this the way we all are? We begin to worship and praise and suddenly
find ourselves lecturing someone who isn’t God and isn’t there. Our minds drift
to something that excites an emotion other than love: lust, fear, anger,
anxiety, self-centeredness, self-pity, etc. After a time, we realize how
quickly and how far our minds have traveled from where we wanted them to be. We
return to God, penitent and pensive, perhaps swinging from one extreme of
arrogance (How good I am and bad they are!) to the other (I’m a worm!)
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