Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not
boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not
easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but
rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
always perseveres. Love never fails. (I Corinthians 13:4-8a)
Proud: feeling deep pleasure or satisfaction as a result of one's own achievements, qualities, or possessions or those of someone with whom one is closely associated; having or showing a high or excessively high opinion of oneself or one's importance.
One of the things that tends to bother me about a lot of Scripture is
that it tells me that I don’t matter. I’m just one of the multitude. I’m
invisible (in ways that I don’t want to be.) Yes, if I were the only sinner,
Jesus would have died for me alone, but I’m not the only sinner. I’m just one
of billions. Over and over in my life, I’ve been passed over, the last to be chosen
on the team, ignored, abandoned, rejected. Years ago, I discovered that when I
meet someone new, I try to impress them with what a freak I am so that they
walk away sooner rather than later – because they are going to walk away. It’s still pride, by the way – and worse, it’s
injured pride. The focus is still on Me, Myself and I.
How, out of this broken, hurt, self-centered condition am I supposed to love? I suspect that could be the subject of ten thousand blog posts and I feel like I’m just beginning and being so negative about it. Year ago, there was a series on TV called “What Not To Wear.” I liked the show, but I always hated the time that the fashionistas spent shredding the ego of their intervention. I know why they did it. It’s brain-washing 101. It’s the same reason that drill sergeants and training instructors abuse their recruits. It isn’t until the recruit turns from pleasing self to pleasing (or placating) the other or what the other represents that progress can be made. Everything you do must be wrong until or unless it is what the other wants. The goal is to turn you into the image of that other – the fashionista or the soldier, adopting its directives as your standard.
Our life is Basic Training…Bootcamp…the 360o mirror. Scripture wasn’t written for five-star generals, but for recruits. As wonderful as people think this description of love is (and it is wonderful), it’s for beginners. It doesn’t get easier, it gets harder. It’s the toughest job you’ll ever love. The first step is to get over around or past yourself.
How, out of this broken, hurt, self-centered condition am I supposed to love? I suspect that could be the subject of ten thousand blog posts and I feel like I’m just beginning and being so negative about it. Year ago, there was a series on TV called “What Not To Wear.” I liked the show, but I always hated the time that the fashionistas spent shredding the ego of their intervention. I know why they did it. It’s brain-washing 101. It’s the same reason that drill sergeants and training instructors abuse their recruits. It isn’t until the recruit turns from pleasing self to pleasing (or placating) the other or what the other represents that progress can be made. Everything you do must be wrong until or unless it is what the other wants. The goal is to turn you into the image of that other – the fashionista or the soldier, adopting its directives as your standard.
Our life is Basic Training…Bootcamp…the 360o mirror. Scripture wasn’t written for five-star generals, but for recruits. As wonderful as people think this description of love is (and it is wonderful), it’s for beginners. It doesn’t get easier, it gets harder. It’s the toughest job you’ll ever love. The first step is to get over around or past yourself.
Comments
Post a Comment