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Emotional Equations


Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. (Ephesians 4:31)

           Years ago, I read a book called Emotional Equations. Amazingly, I have the notes in my file, but they don’t have bitterness in the list. My guess is that bitterness is probably something like Disappointment * Anger. Disappointment is Expectations – Reality. That would make Bitterness = (Expectations – Reality)*Anger. Or, because bitterness seems to deepen over time, maybe the formula for compound interest needs to be used. It’s too complex to go into here but the point is that over time, anger grows into bitterness, which gets deeper, or anger and/or bitterness fade away.
            As complex as it may be bitterness is easy to catch. A person may not realize that he/she is bitter. They feel justified in their feelings, and entitled to them, especially since they’re right! I struggled with bitterness toward my parents (especially my father) for years. I thought I loved them, and I probably did – except for this one little thing…two little things…three little things.  I didn’t realize I was bitter for a long time, and once I did, I felt helpless. Forgiveness came slowly, and in stages. There are directions I know I can’t let my mind wander, even now. It wouldn’t have taken so long if I’d known it was there and turned toward God with it. That’s part of the trouble with bitterness, it’s a stealthy disease, sort of like HIV/AIDS.
           If anger separates us from God, bitterness is that gap eroding into a gully or a gorge. Bitterness is an anger infection, festering in our souls and causing spiritual gangrene in our lives. The weapons used against anger are necessary: the belt of truth, the boots of the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. So is the fruit of the Spirit, but for bitterness, the sword of the Spirit is probably one key. Prayer is another. A third may be counseling with someone you trust, a spiritual doctor if you will.

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