Skip to main content

Who Told You?

             And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree from which I commanded you not to eat?” (Genesis 3:11) 

            And God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM”; and He said, “This is what you shall say to the sons of Israel: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’ (Exodus 3:14 capitalization in the original)

 

            Having spent the better part of the day fussing over the passage for the day, I find myself struggling and working my way into a crisis. I keep coming back to how miserably I have failed. Successful people have made something of their lives by this point. They’re retiring from having been Somebody.

            I remember, thirty years ago, wanting desperately to be a Somebody. And it seems as if ever step I’ve taken since has been away from that same goal. Sometimes, it was because I realized I didn’t want anything to do with the associated person or people. I didn’t, for instance, want to be part of corporate America or politics. Sometimes, it’s because my career trajectory kept going the “wrong” way. I was an administrative assistant to a county official, then a glorified stock clerk. I advanced to manage a department and selling pretty stones, then became a caregiver with dreams of being a writer.

            I’ve become a writer but stopped being a caregiver. I became a volunteer, part-time gardener, and seasonal clerk in a garden center. In terms of being a Somebody, I’m circling around the drain.

          And then I hear the questions:

Who told you that you have to be Someone? (Or even someone?)

Why not simply be? Not even “be yourself,” but simply be?

If God is “I AM WHO I AM” and I am created in His image, shouldn’t my goal to be who I am? Shouldn’t that be the goal instead of worrying about how big a failure I am to (insert name of person) because I’m not (insert thing that I am not or thing I have not done.)

            Of course, part of the problem is that I don’t think I know who God is, or who I am – not really. And now I have to hide under my desk because the thought that goes with that is … oh, what an adventure, to look for the answer to those two things I don’t know. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Higher Thoughts

  “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the  Lord . “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9)           The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments,   for, “Who has known the mind of the Lord      so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ. (I Corinthians 2:15-16) If you read about the ancient gods of the various peoples, you’ll find that they think just like people. In fact, they think just like the sort of people we really wouldn’t want to be around. They think like the most corrupt Hollywood producer or, like hormone overloaded teens with no upbringing.   It’s embarrassing to read. I have a friend who argues that because God is not just like us, He is so vastly dif...
2 comments
Read more

Think About These Things

                 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8) This passage is a major challenge for me. Like everyone else, I struggle to keep my thoughts from wandering off into the weeds, then wondering what possible benefits those weeds might have… Sigh. But as a writer, I have to delve at least a little into the ignoble, wrong, impure, unlovely, and debased. After all, there’s no story if everything’s just as it should be and everyone’s happy. As Christians, there are times when we need to deal with all the negatives, but that makes it even more important that we practice turning our minds by force of attention to what is noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. It’s just too easy to get stuck in a swamp. With my...
1 comment
Read more

A Virgin?

           Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel. (Isaiah 7:14)           This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 1:18)           But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end.”            “How will this be,” Mary asked the...
Post a Comment
Read more