Skip to main content

Boasting

             But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends. (II Corinthians 10:17-18) 

          When you feel defensive, what do you do? Fight or flight? Dominate or withdraw? Or both? Right now, verses that seem to address other things vibrate in harmony with this issue of defensiveness, and that’s how it should be. The fruit of the Spirit aren’t love, joy, peace, etc. The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, etc. In the same way, the fruit of the flesh aren’t this, that, and the other – this, that, and the other are the fruit of the flesh. The Spirit and the Flesh are the sources.

          Defensiveness tends to involve either building walls to keep ourselves in and/or other people out, or it involves what amounts to a public trial. Let me explain how I am the victim, or maybe how I am the monster, so that people victimize me on my terms. They walk or run away now rather than later.

          In other words, being defensive tends to turn the spotlight on me. Let me tell you all about me, how I’m different, how I’m special, and all the reasons why you should treat me this way instead of that. Modern interpersonal relationship gurus have canonized this. We are not to speak in terms of what is right or wrong. Instead, we’re to keep the focus on how we feel. We’re told that in a discussion, we should say, “When you ________, I felt ______.” And there’s a place for that, but how often does such a statement end up spiraling down around us, becoming nothing more than our assertion of ourselves as the standard? How often does it come down to self-promotion or commending ourselves?

          And why do we commend ourselves? Because we want approval, but that approval can’t just be from ourselves. Others must cease their attack. Others must not only be silent in disapproval (against which we are defending ourselves) but be vocal in their approval. They must validate.

          But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” How in the world do I do that? How do I do it in a manner that doesn’t make me sound like a lunatic, even to myself? How do I do it in a manner that is actually boasting in the Lord and not trying to manipulate Him into commending me or doing my will?

          One possible answer goes back to something that happened earlier this summer. Someone pointed out a strength of someone else, and I noticed that strength. I noticed the strengths of some other folks in the group – strengths I had not noticed before. I don’t do as well as I’d like, but I’ve been trying to pay attention to them, to notice and pay better attention. Not everything they say gains my attention and appreciation, and I’m not sure everything should.

          But is at least part of the answer to the question of how to boast in the Lord to pay attention? To notice what He says and does? Commending others for what they say and do comes naturally when I pay attention. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The List

              Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,   through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;   perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. (Romans 5:1-5)           Think about it. We have been justified. At least, we could be justified if we stopped insisting that our justification be based on our merits. We have peace with God, or could have peace if we stopped throwing temper tantrums. We have gained access into grace i...
Post a Comment
Read more

Meditations of the Heart

  May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. (Psalm19:14)           As I started writing this post, I noted that the meditations of my heart are all over the mental landscape, from a hub where eight superhighways come together to a lunar or nuclear landscape. Do you see my error? The moment I read the word meditation , I think about thoughts. But what’s described here is the meditations of our hearts ; our wills.           While the meditations of our minds may be all over the place, the meditations of our wills tend to be a little more stable by the time we are adults. We no longer tend to want to pursue the ten separate careers we did in any given day as children. Part of this is humble acceptance of reality. We come to understand that we can’t do it all. I think another part of it is disappointmen...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Way, The Truth, and The Life

              Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me . (John 14:6)           If “I am the gate of the sheep…I am the good shepherd” from chapter 10 is a double whammy, this verse is a triple whammy. And its first victim is the notion that any other so-called god was acceptable or the same as Jesus. He, and He alone is the way, the truth, and the life, and the only way to get to the Father. There is no other Savior, or Redeemer, according to Jesus. Now, to be fair, other religions will claim that their religion or god(s) are the only way. That is the nature of gods and of religions. If this and that are equally good and agree on what’s necessary, then this and that are the same thing, so there’s no need to from the other to one. If that’s the case, then why speak against the other or promote the one? There’s a song I’ve been listening to i...
Post a Comment
Read more