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Guilty!

     for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, (Romans 3:23)

 

Sadly, I can’t find the other passage I wanted to use today. It had to do with some people having tender consciences, but it wasn’t about eating foods sacrificed to idols. The point of the two verses was to introduce an idea shared by John Ortberg yesterday about guilt. As Romans 3:23 points out, we are all sinners. We are all guilty. Christians have been forgiven, our sins have been atoned for, and so we are declared “not guilty.” Sometimes there’s more than a little reason to wonder about the “not-guilty”-ness of some, but that’s another issue. And concerning some specific sins, there are probably many who are not guilty. The key here is that at this point, we are talking about a legal condition. One is either guilty, or one is not guilty. There was a time when this was fairly well-recognized in society.

But in addition to the condition of guilt, there is also a feeling of guilt. You can feel guilty or not feel guilty.  Ultimately, this chart summarizes the possibilities:

 

Guilty and Feeling Guilty

 

Not Guilty and Feeling Guilty

(Neurotic)

Guilty and Not Feeling Guilty

(Narcissistic or Nihilistic)

Not Guilty and Not Feeling Guilty

 

The green quadrants in are the ones we need to avoid. They are refusals to deal with reality and are unhealthy for us. What about the other two? The best choice is to be in the bottom right quadrant: to not be guilty and not feel guilty. But feeling guilty when we are guilty is still sane. It’s still dealing with reality, and it’s still healthy because we can do something about it. We can turn away from what we have done wrong. We can seek forgiveness.

One of the problems we face is the fact that we can’t always be sure whether we are actually guilty or not. Are we doing something because we are good or because we want to be seen as good? Is what we’re doing good because we like it – it’s our choice, or it makes us feel good – or because it is actually good? Is something only good if we don’t like it but do it anyway?  It’s difficult to discern our own motives, especially since they so often are mixed. Yes, it’s the right thing to do, but we have to admit, we’d like to also be seen as doing what is right. And when we do the right thing and are not guilty of doing the wrong thing, how often to we grow self-righteous or smug, thereby becoming guilty of something else?

The key to all of this is the development of close relationships with those who can help us see our guilty conditions and who can help us to separate the feelings of guilt from the reality of guilt. And the best objective viewer of our lives is the One who can look on the heart, not just at our appearance.

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