Skip to main content

Love Is...

             Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (I Corinthians 13:4-7)


We love because he first loved us. (I John 4:19)

 

Yesterday, I defined love as a commitment to do what is in the best interest of the beloved while maintaining a healthy relationship with the beloved. Today’s passage is a description of what that looks like. In the past, I’ve suggested that you look in a mirror and recite the passage while looking in your eyes. The first time, change the word “love” to “God” and add “to me,” “with me” or whatever is needed to make yourself the direction object of God’s actions. The second time, change “love” to “I” and add a direct object of someone in your life. Stop whenever you find something difficult to say and talk with God about it.   

But, let’s return to the bluntness of yesterday. Why do you love your spouse or significant other? Some people have said “Because __ makes me laugh,” “Because ___’s beautiful/handsome,” “Because ___ makes me feel good about myself,” or “because ___ completes me.” I’ve heard other women talk about the notion of ever submitting to her husband being horrific because men are abusive. And, of course, there’s the “sexual chemistry” angle. And then there’s my own lame statement. I’m not sure I do love, but if I do, it’s probably because that’s my job or responsibility. After all, we’re commanded to love God and one another.

I have two thoughts about the sort of love described above. The first is that those things don’t describe love, they describe use and possibly toxicity. The second is that the person asks loves because the person they love loves them, just as we love God because God first loved us. I’m not setting up a dichotomy. The answer isn’t “one or the other.” It could be both or neither. You may have different answers, but the question we should ask ourselves about our love is whether or not – right this moment – it could be described by the today’s passage. And when the beloved does something that isn’t loving, or isn’t approved? Does the passage still describe us?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Especially to those who belong to the family of believers."

Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. (Gal 6:10)   “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.   By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)           Joshua grinned when he saw Rex standing by the door, studying something on the ground. "Hey, man! Are we ready to do this thing?"          Rex looked up. "Josh, I can't do it. We're still best buds, but I can't stand your fiancée."           I've met "Rex" many times. I've been Rex. Joshua (Jesus) loves the Church. He's not a fool. He knows the Church is far from perfect, but she is His chosen bride. The Rexes of this world, who think themselves His friend, turn away from her. "You don't need the Church to...
Post a Comment
Read more

Shark Fins, Triple Dog Dares, Heroes, Villains and Sidekicks

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)            There's a scene in Jaws in which someone sees a shark fin and starts a panic. As   all the swimmers scramble to shore, boats surround the fin, which falls over to reveal two kids. With several guns pointed at them, one of the kids points at the other. The message is clear: it was his idea. In Christmas Story, there's a scene in which one kid "triple dog dares" another to do something stupid. Since it's a triple dog dare, well, what choice does the boy have? There doesn't seem to be any end to the trouble that peer pressure can cause. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Ssssssubmmissssssionnn

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ . (Ephesians 5:21)             "Ssssssubmmisssssssionnn." Can't you just hear the serpent hissing this most horrible of words? If you listen to the serpent or the world, submission means groveling, allowing yourself to be abused, denying yourself your own humanity. Nothing could be worse than submission, could it?             Submission has never been a problem for me, as long as things are going the way I want them to. The rest of the time? Well, let's just say that while I don't know how to fight physically, I don't know how to not fight mentally. One of the fights I've been having with myself for years is about submission.             My first breakthrough took place on a trip to a bookstore. As I walked into the store, my thoughts were very clear. 1) I was goi...
Post a Comment
Read more