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Humility And The Wall of Reality


“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector.  I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’
          “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’
          “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.” (Luke 18:10-14)


          “I’m just as good as you are.”
          “I deserve respect!”
          “I’m proud of being ______________”
          “I’m a ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­________________ god(dess)”
          “Don’t you know who I am?”
           “LOOK AT ME!” That’s what we hear and say with every breath. Our society seems to be frantic (perhaps even deranged) in its need for each person to feel his/her greatness because everything bad happens when people don’t feel good about themselves. At the same time, our society rejects those they decide feel so good about themselves that they reject society’s rules. The good sort of pride seems to have to do with being a member of some approved, so-called minority. The bad sort of pride seems to have to do with not fitting into any of the approved groups and not approving of those groups.
          History rejects the notion that bad things happen when people don’t feel good about themselves. Bad things happen when people believe that they are better than society, better than society’s leaders, better than those around them, deserving of special treatment, and having the right to take control.
          More importantly, God rejects this. Why? Why doesn’t God want us to feel good about ourselves? Didn’t He create us? Why would He want us to feel like we’re garbage? Why does He want us to be humiliated? Why is God so all-fired insistent on our being humble? Could it be that He’s insecure?
          I don’t believe that God is insecure. I don’t believe that He wants us to be humiliated. I don’t think humility or pride are about our feelings. I believe they are about facts and perhaps about the feelings of others. Pride says “Look at ME.” Pride raises up self at the expense of others. It takes no pride on God’s part for Him to say, “I am God and there is no other.” It’s a statement of fact. For us to reject that fact is an act of pride, a statement that we know better than He who deserves to be considered a god. Our choices in that regard are always made in our image. They are pathetic in comparison – mere shadows of shadows – thin and impotent jokes.
       Like the tax collector in today’s passage, we want God to say, “Oh my self!” in wonder at US. We’re like children who tie a pillow case or piece of cloth around our necks, run around the room (or across furniture) with our hands over our heads calling, “Look, I can fly!” Particularly pathetic is the simultaneous claim that we are both great, and the chance result of billions of years of chance results – the most recent in a long string of accidents and mistakes.
  Humility is, first and foremost, about truth. We are not God. The only way that we can “feel good” about ourselves is to compare ourselves to others and to find them insufficient. The alternatives – being one of the herd, being a nobody, being invisible – those are terrifying. Far better to set double standards than to cease to matter.
          The problem is that living a lie isn’t good for us in the long run. Eventually, we hit the truth at nearly light-speed and find that it is an immovable object, but we are not an irresistible force. Truth does not shatter, we do. Isn’t it wiser to move more slowly, so that when we hit the truth, we bounce back?
         The second reality is that humility is about love. Some will immediately say that if we do not love ourselves, we cannot love our neighbors as ourselves. That’s true, but if love involves giving ourselves reason to think we’re better than those around us, then loving others as ourselves means giving them reason to think that they are better than those around them. Since “those around them” includes us, this idea of love means that we cannot love others as ourselves without failing to love ourselves. It’s a contradiction. Love does not involve setting ourselves or anyone else up for the inevitable crash into that wall of reality.

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