A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. (Proverbs 12:4)
Here we go. I have a friend who mentioned that she gets tired of hearing about bad women, and how women “should” behave as told by a man. I understand completely. Keep in mind that Solomon wrote many of these proverbs to guide his son(s). I have a love/hate relationship with verses about women – I love them because I know God inspired them and they are true. A wife of a noble character is her husband’s crown, and a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. One hundred percent accurate. Switch the roles and it’s just as true. I hate them because quite often the terms aren’t defined carefully, and the ideal presented seems to be to be unattainable. I don’t think it really is unattainable. I see it as such because the terms aren’t defined – which means I define them. and my definitions tend to be excessive when I try to apply them to myself.
I looked up “noble.” The dictionary says that it means behaving like a noble. Yes, I know, historically nobles have not been noble. I didn’t want to take all day trying to find ideas. I did find on site that provided what looks to me like good ideas.[1] I’m not going to even guess as to whether or not he’s a Christian (probably not) but he gives some food for thought.
First, he describes being noble as being patient. For him, patience means being tolerant, having control of anger, enduring harm received from others (no retaliation), being forbearing, and being deliberate in action. Patience demands that we be gentle, and not rash or hasty. Secondly, he says the noble person is chaste. That means the noble person avoids every imprudent characteristic. One who is noble is modest, has integrity, does not fornicate, is not stingy, does not lie, gossip, slander, libel or cause separation and discord between people. Thirdly, the noble person is courageous. He says this requires a proper sense of self-esteem (not too much, not too little), to emphasize good manners and make them a part of life, to be generous, strong-willed and determined. It requires that we distance ourselves from ardent lowly desires, to control our anger, and to curb violent and destructive behavior. Lastly, he says that to be noble requires that we be just. To be just means that we are impartial in our behavior toward people. We don’t favor the rich or the poor, the black, the white, or any other so-called race. We don’t grant special protections to any group or allow them to prey on someone else. It motivates us to be generous and kind, which he describes as the middle course between degradation and arrogance, and between cowardice and imprudence, and between extreme unnecessary anger and ignominy.
Overall, it looks to me like being noble involves being good without either being arrogant or a doormat. I like this idea. Abigail comes to mind. Her husband, Nabal, was a fool. His name apparently even means “fool.” David’s men had protected his sheep – we don’t know for how long. When it came time for sheering, David requested a little compensation, and Nabal not only refused, he refused rudely and then threw a party. When Abigail found out, she didn’t shrug her shoulder and say, “Nothing I can do.” She got food ready without permission and took it to David. She followed and talked sense into David, too. Later, when Nabal was sober, she told him what was what.
Being a noble wife isn’t easy. I think we’re all lacking in each of the four categories somehow, but the areas I’m most aware of my failure are in patience and courage. And part of the patience aspect is that we continue to be noble even when the husband is a Nabal.
I looked up “noble.” The dictionary says that it means behaving like a noble. Yes, I know, historically nobles have not been noble. I didn’t want to take all day trying to find ideas. I did find on site that provided what looks to me like good ideas.[1] I’m not going to even guess as to whether or not he’s a Christian (probably not) but he gives some food for thought.
First, he describes being noble as being patient. For him, patience means being tolerant, having control of anger, enduring harm received from others (no retaliation), being forbearing, and being deliberate in action. Patience demands that we be gentle, and not rash or hasty. Secondly, he says the noble person is chaste. That means the noble person avoids every imprudent characteristic. One who is noble is modest, has integrity, does not fornicate, is not stingy, does not lie, gossip, slander, libel or cause separation and discord between people. Thirdly, the noble person is courageous. He says this requires a proper sense of self-esteem (not too much, not too little), to emphasize good manners and make them a part of life, to be generous, strong-willed and determined. It requires that we distance ourselves from ardent lowly desires, to control our anger, and to curb violent and destructive behavior. Lastly, he says that to be noble requires that we be just. To be just means that we are impartial in our behavior toward people. We don’t favor the rich or the poor, the black, the white, or any other so-called race. We don’t grant special protections to any group or allow them to prey on someone else. It motivates us to be generous and kind, which he describes as the middle course between degradation and arrogance, and between cowardice and imprudence, and between extreme unnecessary anger and ignominy.
Overall, it looks to me like being noble involves being good without either being arrogant or a doormat. I like this idea. Abigail comes to mind. Her husband, Nabal, was a fool. His name apparently even means “fool.” David’s men had protected his sheep – we don’t know for how long. When it came time for sheering, David requested a little compensation, and Nabal not only refused, he refused rudely and then threw a party. When Abigail found out, she didn’t shrug her shoulder and say, “Nothing I can do.” She got food ready without permission and took it to David. She followed and talked sense into David, too. Later, when Nabal was sober, she told him what was what.
Being a noble wife isn’t easy. I think we’re all lacking in each of the four categories somehow, but the areas I’m most aware of my failure are in patience and courage. And part of the patience aspect is that we continue to be noble even when the husband is a Nabal.
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