Needy Soul

 As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while people say to me all day long, “Where is your God?”

These things I remember as I pour out my soul: how I used to go to the house of God under the protection of the Mighty One  with shouts of joy and praise among the festive throng. (Psalm 42:1-4)

 

            Deer pant because they are thirsty, hot, and/or afraid. They pant because they need. John Ortberg discusses the fact that our souls are needy. This passage tells us that our souls thirst for God. Our tears may be our food, but they don’t meet our needs. God does that. Since this past summer, I’ve been exploring the edges of our needs. The needs of the body are sort of easy: oxygen, circulation, shelter, nutritious food, water, exercise (aerobic, strength, and flexibility,) and rest. I’m trying to make some changes in this area, to make better choices. It’s hard.

            But it can be harder to figure out the parallels for what our minds, wills, relationships, and souls need. What is will-food, and how do we know whether we need to feed it more, or put it on a diet? What is water for our minds? What is exercise for our souls? Or rest for our relationships? And, as John Ortberg and the psalmist point out, what we really need is God. But God still made our bodies to need oxygen, circulation, shelter, nutritious food, water, exercise, and rest. What is the oxygen of emotions? What is the food of the mind? What is the circulation of the will? Or don’t emotions, mind, and will need something that feeds them? Or does a bowl of broccoli feed the soul?

            I don’t know, but I don’t think so. There are other things that God taught us – we need to love and be loved. We need to have hope. Jesus taught extensively about our faith. He also taught lessons about time, talent, and treasure. Jesus spoke of being the bread of life; the way, the truth, and the life; the living water.

            I want there to be correlations. I want to be able to figure out what constitutes vitamin C, water, and oxygen for my emotions, thoughts, will, and soul, but I also know that people lived for centuries – and were probably healthier than I am physically even though they never heard of vitamins, let alone vitamin C. So it’s not so important that I know what is my mind’s vitamin C. People didn’t need to experiment to discover that they needed food. I’m not giving up on learning these things, but I suspect we meet the needs of those other parts without knowing. Just as we eat when we crave food, and sleep when we need rest, we seek out what our emotions, our thoughts, our wills, and our souls need.

            Clearly, I’m on one of my gerbil wheels, going around and around and not getting far – but I’ve learned that sometimes, that’s part of the process. One answer that comes to mind is something I’ve said before: faith is a muscle. It’s something that needs exercise. Is it a muscle of the heart/will? The mind? The soul? I don’t know. If that’s the case, I suspect that hope is either oxygen or blood, but again, for what? I don’t know that, but I know we need them. That’s progress.