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And Queen Esther had me to tea

         Haman went out that day happy and in high spirits. But when he saw Mordecai at the king’s gate and observed that he neither rose nor showed fear in his presence, he was filled with rage against Mordecai. 
                Nevertheless, Haman restrained himself and went home. Calling together his friends and Zeresh, his wife, Haman boasted to them about his vast wealth, his many sons, and all the ways the king had honored him and how he had elevated him above the other nobles and officials. “And that’s not all,” Haman added. “I’m the only person Queen Esther invited to accompany the king to the banquet she gave. And she has invited me along with the king tomorrow. But all this gives me no satisfaction as long as I see that Jew Mordecai sitting at the king’s gate.” 
            His wife Zeresh and all his friends said to him, “Have a gallows built, seventy-five feet high, and ask the king in the morning to have Mordecai hanged on it. Then go with the king to the dinner and be happy.” This suggestion delighted Haman, and he had the gallows built.  (Esther 5:9-14)

            What does it take to ruin your day? I got to sleep (I think) about 2 a.m. after lying in bed for a couple hours. At about 4, I got up to find Dad snacking. I wrote him a note saying when he was done, he needed to wait until after 6 to eat breakfast, and I went back to bed. At 5:55, I heard a voice at my door, “Are you going to get up and help me with breakfast?” The whole thing about the time is that he has a medication he’s suppose to take at least two hours after he’s eaten and 30-45 minutes before he eats.” I try to get up early and give it to him, and then we both go back to bed, but not this morning. To me, that means I’ve failed to be a good caretaker this morning. (I know it’s not true, but that’s a battle for me to accept.)
            I try not to let things like that ruin my day, but it’s like I told my neighbor last night. There’s a scene in Young Sherlock Holmes in which the young Sherlock scratches away on a violin for maybe a minute, then puts it down on the bed, disgusted. He’s never going to master the thing, he declares. When his fellow student asks how long he’s been studying violin, it turns out he just got it. That was his first practice. That’s how I am about everything. Failure at anything tends to ruin my day. Fortunately, I’m stubborn. Failure may ruin my day, but it doesn’t (always) stop me, and failure is especially damaging if I’m coming off a success.
            So I guess I can sort of understand how Haman felt. He was at the height of success. Not only was he the king’s #1 buddy, but Queen Esther invited him to dine. How could life get any better. Then… Mordecai. It reminds me of a song from Rod Stewart’s “Great American Song Book vol 2)
I've flown around the world in a plane
I've settled revolutions in Spain
The North Pole I have charted
But I can't get started with you
And at the golf course I'm under par
And in Hollywood they want me to star
I've got a house as a show place
But I can't get no place with you
You're so supreme
The lyrics I write of you, scheme
Just for the sight of you, dream
Both day and night of you
But what good does it do
In nineteen ninety-nine, I sold short
In England, I'm presented at court
Yeah you've got me so downhearted
'Cause I'll never get started with you
You're so supreme
The lyrics I write of you, scheme
Just for the sight of you, dream
Both day and night of you
But what, what good does it do
I've been consulted by Hilary C.
And [Queen Esther’s] had me to tea[1]
But now I'm brokenhearted
'Cause I can't get started with you
Yeah I'm brokenhearted
'Cause I can't get started with you

            That seems to be about the way Haman feels. Now, remember, there’s already a death sentence hanging over Mordecai’s head, but Haman’s wife encouraged him to focus on the one negative in his life. It doesn’t matter that Esther has invited him back for a second day in a row. The only thing that makes him happy is the thought of killing Mordecai in the most public, most dramatic way he can think of: a 50 ft gallows. 
            So how much does it take for your day to be ruined? What does it take to fix it? This is why I pray about my attitude so much.


[1] Mr. Stewart sings “Tina Turner’s"

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